Jun 19, 2013
Let me give you a hint:
"The Shortest Straw Has Been Pulled For You"
I'm sure by now you got it. If it wasn't the mullet, I bet that short dick gave it away.
The news isn't new, it surfaced few years ago, but because I've never searched for foot fetish nor do I worry about Lars' small penis, I never came across it.
To be honest, when I saw nude Lars, I was surprised not to find a hairy pussy down there. With his drama queen tendencies running rampant in "Some Kind of Monster" (title certainly not referring to size of his junk) it made perfect sense.
Well, it turns out that in addition to acting like a pussy, he's also a massive douche on and off the big screen or big stage. Apparently (and this is in James' own words) before he comes out on stage, he gets his roadies to put socks on his feet. Maybe it's because in the meantime he's busy practicing paradiddles and doesn't have time, but my money is on some sort of fetish. Perhaps the roots of that lie in his addiction to, what Dave Mustaine called "weird Danish porn collection" when he first met 'The World's Greatest Drummer. Either way Lars, you may need some help. If that wasn't enough, Metallica drummer also gets his roadies to put earphones on for him.
Surely if flies could talk, we'd learn about who dries him off after shower or who wipes his ass. Some things are better left untold.