Jul 30, 2012

Metalcore as described in Urban Dictionary

Somebody asked me recently to describe metalcore. Just so you don't accuse me of abusing that whole genre, I will resort to pulling quotes from the ever popular UrbanDictionary.com instead, ok?

“...lame form of music preferred by young kids who have no clue about real pain but think that dad not buying them an XBOX Elite is the worst thing that ever happened to them...”
“...most of them were wiggers a few years ago. Vocalist of band always has the same pose, mic grip, and stupid look on his face as the vocalist of any other metalcore band. Always cup the mike for growly bits...”
 “...a poor excuse for all metal...”
“...it is said to be derived from hardcore punk and heavy metal, but really sounds like Panic! at the Disco with heavier guitar riffs. The vocalists are usually washed up emos...”
 “...once opened, the shittackular music spewed through the anal leakage which formed shitty bands like as I lay dying and unearth....”
 “...a watered-down form of melodic death metal, due to it's lack of keyboard, less brutal vocals, and overall shorter songs. Listened to by scenester kids, along with deathcore, who are ignorant to it's superior predecessor which originated in Sweden...”

And my fave, written in a form of a dialogue:
- DUDE!!! I was listening to hatebreed!! Thats fuckin sick ass hardcore!!!!! 
No, they're metalcore... 
- No they're not!! Metalcore's bands like the Devil Wears Prada and Killswitch!!! 
Devil Wears Prada is more of a screamo band. Killswitch Engage's melodic metalcore, Hatebreed is regular metalcore, metallic hardcore. 
- Oh... 


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