Jul 12, 2012

Lich King - Black Metal Sucks




You'd think this was a classic thrash band from the 80s, but these dudes, who obviously don't take themselves seriously, released an album called "Super Retro Thrash" in 2011. This little gem appears on the album.
Be sure to read the lyrics AND watch as you listen to this.

(Remember dudes to learn to take a joke or stop visiting sites such as this if you have no sense of humor. May I suggest listening to AC/DC instead?)

 
Over there in Norway, the churches all burn down
Let's go dress in goth clothes and get painted like a clown
Awesome leather armbands with spikes like two feet long
Hair is parted down the middle, frowning like a frog 
In league with the devil, talking Satan, skulls and hell
Making mommy mad, cause that's original
If you hate good music, then it can't hurt to go
Image-conscious assholes, black metal fashion show 
I hope that you get hit by a bus. Why?
Black metal sucks
Careful not to smear your makeup
You suck
Goth clothes and frowns, just like we discussed
Black metal sucks
Auuuuuuuuuugh What?
You suck 
Blacke Foryst of Despayr, taking photos of the band
Put 'em up on myspace you're the envy of the land
Posing with a battleaxe and grimacing with hate
When you're done with this, figure skating at the lake 
The music is best, it's got the hardest metal sound
Quickly riffing on one note is certain to astound
Dimly echoed drumming and some goat heads to distract
From the terrible screeching that you pass off as your act 
I wish your black clothes would combust. Why?
Black metal sucks
You know what dude, you look like a schmuck
You suck
Singer sounds like a wounded duck
Black metal sucks
I'd rather listen to... us
You suck 
You know how I know you look like a fool?
Lich King rules
We're the best band and we're super cool
We rule
Straight from the 80's and we're old school
Lich King rules
Running out of rhymes, so wading pool
Thrash is the rule

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