May 31, 2012

Blowing chunks on stage during Maryland Deathfest

Watching this vid would make a great prank for your hangover buddy on a Sunday morning. Just fast forward the first 2:20 and check out vocalist C.T. of Rwake blowing chunks on stage during The Maryland Deathfest 2012. While he is vomiting all over the stage and screaming at the same time, his band members hardly even notice.

May 30, 2012

"Little Ozzy" gets up in front of Sharon

Standing at 4 feet and 8 inches, Lin Doak, (Little Ozzy) 45, is an Ozzy Osbourne impersonator who has auditioned for "America's Got Talent" last night in front of Ozzy's wife, Sharon Osbourne, who is one of the judges on the talent competition. He sang "Mama I'm Comin' Home" — a song Ozzy wrote especially for her.

"I have to tell you something. My husband is away from me right now, and it made me miss him even more by you singing me that song, so I really thank you," Sharon said before declining to let him through to the next round.

As you can witness in the video below, Lin Doak looks and sounds remarkably like Ozzy Osbourne.

Source: Blabbermouth

If you fuck with our furry friends you'll deal with Oderus

The master of the Earth and horse raper GWAR lead singer Oderus Urungus — has a few choice words for humans who "take animals, rip their skins off, and make marmoset banana hammocks with them." In a brand-new video for peta2, PETA's youth division, Urungus pronounces "a bitter doom on those who fuck with our furry friends" — who he says are humans' "superiors" — and announces GWAR's new plan for an all-natural alternative to fur: the pubic hair of prison inmates.

"GWAR is titillated to be working with peta2, in this, the latest thing that GWAR is doing," says Urungus. "We'll be providing the humans with an alternative to animal fur and also helping improve the hygiene of this country's vast prison industry, in a collaboration that is sure to rip off a few heads."

As you may recall, this is GWAR's second video for peta2. The first, titled "Fight Humans, Not Dogs", pitted a GWAR "slave" against THE RED CHORD's Guy Kozowyk in a no-holds-barred match.

Source: Blabbermouth

May 29, 2012

Sacred Reich guitarist opens Rehab Burger Therapy

According to Blabbermouth, guitarist Wiley Arnett of thrash metal veterans Sacred Reich is part owner of Rehab Burger Therapy, a new restaurant which opened earlier today in Scottsdale, Arizona.

Created by three friends that needed some rehabilitation of their own, Rehab Burger Therapy is a story of fate and convictions that began back in 1994 when Denise Nelson, Ken Likewise and Wiley first met in Scottsdale at a fledgling pizza joint they were recruited to nurture.

Rehab Burger Therapy
7210 E. 2nd Street
Scottsdale, AZ 85251

For more information, visit

May 28, 2012

FREEBIE! - Story Of Jade "Bleedin' Cage"

Italian metallers Story of Jade are offering a free song download of a previously unreleased track called "Bleedin' Cage" from their "The Damned Next Door" album.

You can also check out Story of Jade's video clip for "Self Inflicted Masterpiece" below. Perhaps not the greatest work of art, but this promo video is hard to peel your eyes off of. See if you can.

May 25, 2012

Jizz on Tenacious D cumrag

File this under SICK!!! WHAT!?! Or WTF?!?
In addition to guitar tabs and sasquatch hats, you can now purchase a cumrag via the Tenacious D's merch store. Yeah, I think that Jack Black or Kyle Gass make me a Vomitatious D and looking for a barfbag, not a cumrag, but those of you into hairy (G)ass now have a perfect product.

May 24, 2012

Limewire is sued for more than the wealth of the world

The RIAA is trying to sue once relevant and often used to pirate music Limewire.
The problem is they're asking $72,000,000,000. Yes, that is $72 trillion, which is 20% more than the combined wealth of the entire world which is $60 trillion!

The judge in the case dismissed the figure, and said the music industry is only entitled to sue LimeWire per song, rather than for every individual download.
This could still be substantial sum of money. At the proposed figure of $150,000 per song, LimeWire could be forced to pay a $1.65 billion fine.

This has surely wetted Lars' appetite, since he recently announced that Metallica (unlike most of their fans) cannot afford to take a few years off and must continue touring to make ends meet.

With services such as Spotify, Rdio or Pandora, does anyone still pirate music?
In Canada of course you don't have much of a choice. It's either buying music at Walmart or a ripping off a parking lot of cars at an Iron Maiden concert, but elsewhere in the world, why would you steel music when you can get it for so cheap. Legally.

May 23, 2012

Death Metal Nutrition Facts

Ever wonder what you ingest when you consume too much Death Metal?
Stop wondering. Just glance over at the label.

Iron Man on Google Doodle Moog

All you inspired office musicians out there.
You got the tab, uhmm…  I mean keyboard shortcuts, do it!

May 22, 2012

Prosthetic Records signs a 14-string virtuoso

Check out Felix Martin in action. Venezuelan guitarist, prestigious Barkley School of Music grad who was recently signed to Prosthetic Records.

He now joins another virtuoso Tosin Abasi (Animals as Leader), also signed to Prosthetic Records.

Martin commented on signing to Prosthetic Records by stating the following: "For me, the most important concepts in music (and life) are innovation and creativity. Prosthetic is one of the very few labels that works with artists who have unique visions of music, and who offer something different to the world. I can’t be more thankful with Prosthetic for supporting my vision and letting me be myself."

Martin's Prosthetic debut, "Live In Boston", will be released across digital platforms on June 5. Physical copies are available for pre-order now at this location.

See the article in Blabbermouth.

Twisted Sister rides the carpet to the cleaners

In a new twisted TV commercial spot for some carpet cleaner, Dee Snider takes a page right out of Gene Simmons school of marketing with a wickedly disturbing trip to the 80's ad featuring Dee in full make-up. Time has not stood still for you dude.

Illegal downloader ordered to pay $675,000

The feds are coming. Time to format your 3 TB external full of pirated music.

According to, The Supreme Court won't reduce the $675,000 verdict against a Boston University student who illegally downloaded 30 songs and shared them on the Internet.

The high court on Monday refused to hear an appeal from Joel Tenenbaum, of Providence, R.I., who was successfully sued by the Recording Industry Association of America for illegally sharing music on peer-to-peer networks. In 2009, a jury ordered Tenenbaum to pay $675,000, or $22,500 for each song he illegally downloaded and shared.

A federal judge called that unconstitutionally excessive, but the 1st U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals reinstated the penalty at the request of Sony BMG Music Entertainment, Warner Brothers Records Inc. and other record labels represented by the RIAA.

Square watermelon for Axl Rose's rider

Rock stars are often known for their outlandish demands and unusual requests, but Axl Rose may have outdone his peers with his current tour rider.

According to British tabloid newspaper The Sun, the Guns N' Roses frontman requests "wines, beers, vodka, red and white roses and a square melon" - an item that Axl says "absolutely can’t be missed."

Square melons are a particular breed of the typically round fruit, believed to be grown in box-shaped jars. The square shape helps retailers stack and store the fruit, so it's certainly an unusual request for Axl.

Apparently the only return request concert organizer have is that Axl Rose actually shows up and eats or smashes the watermelon.

Read the entire article on Ultimate-Guitar.

Win a Slayer motorcycle helmet

So this is pretty badass. To celebrate Slayer playing Reign In Blood in full at ATP’s I’ll Be Your Mirror this Friday – also featuring Sleep, Melvins, Wolves In The Throne Room, Yob and more – we have a Slayer motorcycle helmet to give away!

To stand a chance of winning, simply answer a very easy question over on the Metal Hammer Competitions page.

ATP’s I’ll Be Your Mirror festival featuring Slayer performing Reign In Blood in full takes place on Friday May 25 at Alexandra Palace. Tickets are still available from

May 21, 2012

Hardest thing to do on a guitar

Do you play guitar?
Do you have a YouTube channel you show off your arpeggios on?
If you answered "no" to either one, I bet if you love metal, you love crazy guitar tricks.
Check this one out.

LEGO-compatible Black Metal minifigures for sale

Looking for some new toys for your metal kids? now offers so-called "Norwegian Black Metal Enthusiast" minifugures and you can buy one of those if you hurry up before Gene Simmons gets a hold of this.
Now you can reenact Varg killing Euronymous or Gaahl setting fire to some churches.

The commercialism of Black Metal continues.

Death Metal Band Receives $20,000 Government Grant

According to The Australian, Sydney, Australia-based quintet Ouroboros may be the first death-metal band to receive support from the Australian government through the Australia Council For The Arts.

The Australia Council For The Arts offers a broad range of grants for Australian artists and arts organizations. In 2010-2011, the arts-funding body invested over AUD 163 million (approximately $160 million) in artists and arts organizations to support Australian artists to make art for Australian and international audiences.

Ouroboros' AUD 20,000 grant (approximately $19,670) is to help the band write new songs for its next album that will include a symphony orchestra.

"This is amazing for us," drummer David Horgan told The Australian. "We couldn't consider hiring an orchestra to do this without this kind of support."

Composer Matthew Hindson, chair of the Australia Council music board which approved the grant, said of Ouroboros: "They have a degree of technical virtuosity and musicianship. No matter what kind of music you are involved in, that comes through."

May 18, 2012

What do you mean Bill Ward played in Black Sabbath?

Black Sabbath denies they ever had a drummer named Bill Ward.
He's been removed from photos on their website.

I don't see Bill Ward, do you see him?

I don't see Bill Ward, do you see him?

I don't see Bill Ward, do you see him?

I don't see Bill Ward, do you see him?

Macho man kicks a girl, receives a beatdown

OK, so this doesn't take place at a metal show, but at this outdoor venue, a brainless dude decides to kick some chick. Check out the video to see what happens next.

This is a reminder that chances are if you take your anger and frustration on a girl in or outside of a pit, at a metal or lame ass rock show, you're likely going to get your shit beat out of you. Deservedly so might I add.

Check out the article at MetalSucks.

May 17, 2012

Thief walks out of a store with a guitar in his pants

Gibson has posted a truly bizarre story.

Dude (obviously into baggy-pants-metal) walks into a music store and walks out with a guitar. In his pants!

The theft occurred about 2:30 p.m. April  12 at Spencer’s Music Store in Olathe, Kansas.

Two men entered the store, and surveillance photos show that as one man distracted an employee, the other grabbed a guitar and shoved it down his pants. The two then left the store.

 “We have reason to believe they are involved in similar thefts in other cities in the Midwest,” Allen said. “We are working with other agencies to see if they have had crimes with similar patterns.”

Allen encouraged music storeowners to check their surveillance tapes to see whether they have any missing merchandise.

May 16, 2012

Heavy Metal Smuggling Grannies sparked tape trading in Eastern Europe

The Gauntlet has posted a great article that reminds me so much of growing up under commie regime, except my grandma would bring me shoes and cigarettes. Wish she brought some metal.

"In the 70's, much of Europe was a hotbed of heavy metal activity and many mainstream rock radio stations began playing metal over the air. This was also true of West Germany’s television and radio programming which could be picked up over the air in parts of East Germany giving listeners their first taste of underground metal. The seeds were planted and many East Germans were hooked on metal but with only state run record shops selling AMIGA music, they had no way to purchase the sought after albums and crossing the border into West Germany was still very illegal.

 Around the same time that heavy metal began playing over West German airwaves, East Germany relaxed its emigration laws to allow the elderly, 65 plus, to visit family residing in West Germany. Many teens seized upon this as an opportunity to have grandma smuggle metal records.

Mille Petrozza from Kreator stated "They [fans] found ways to get the records. Older people were allowed to travel outside of East Germany in the later years. A lot of kids would have their grandparents or grandmas bring in metal albums from West Germany. That was how it worked. There was an underground trading scene that developed once the albums were brought in. Our music was extensively known by the East Germans from this. They were adventurous times back then for getting metal."

You must read the whole story here.

May 15, 2012

Blackmetaller elected to Greek Parliament

According to The Gauntlet News, Naer Mataron bassist Giorgos Germenis (aka Kaiadas) has been elected to the Greek Parliament in the Greater Athens district. Germenis was elected as part of the Golden Dawn Party which has been labeled as fascist which the group denies.

Germenis says there's an easy solution for Greece's myriad economic problems. First the country needs to resolve its sea border issues with neighboring countries. There'd be big money in gas and oil exploration which would return Greece to greatness. He blames unspecified "interests" for holding Greece back.

At the very least once powerful and almighty Greece known in the metaland mostly for Firewind and SepticFlesh can now claim to have a Black Metal scene.

May 14, 2012

Kid sets a Slayer record straight on Westboro Baptist Church

This picture says it all. No discriminating here.

May 10, 2012

Devin Townsend had hair in high school

Metal Injection has posted an awesome yearbook mug shot of guitar master Devin Townsend.
He may have lost all the hair, but he managed to pursue his dream.

May 7, 2012

Vladimir Mustaine

As evidenced here, Mustaine has been leading a life of a double agent.

May 4, 2012

Ted Nugent will suck your cock and fuck your wife

As seen in the video below, Ted Nugent, the king of eloquence and compassion, lost it during an interview with a CBS and unloaded his passionate patriotic love on a reporter saying:

"I offer you this: call me when you sit down across from someone who has more families with dying little boys and girls who get a call to take them on their last fishing trip in life. Call me when you meet someone who does that more than I do! Because that's really moderate. You know what that is? That's extreme! I'm an extremely loving, passionate man and people who investigate me honestly, without the baggage of political correctness, ascertain the conclusion that I'm a damned nice guy... and if you can find a screening process more powerful than that, I'll suck your dick."

He then turned to a female producer off camera and added, "Or I'll fuck you. How's that sound?"

Folks, we're beyond guitar playing and gun waiving here. Similarly disconnected and one DNA link away from a chimp Dave Mustaine and Ted Nugent should rally together to chain and send women back their kitchens and black people back to Africa.

May 3, 2012

Jäger at the table with the King

Slayer's Kerry King has single-handedly put Jägermeister on a map and into the cranium of many metal heads. This premium spirit has become a symbol of metal drinking. All without the help of any television support. That is changing, as Jäger now has a TV commercial spot featuring Kerry King himself.
Check it out below.

May 2, 2012

Wanna fill Gene Hoglan's shoes? Go find them.

Gene Hoglan, "The Atomic Clock" has checked in from the Testament tour in Chile ending the report with a discovery of some missing equipment.

"Hey everybody, I just got back from Chile, where I played with TESTAMENT at The Metal Fest and boy, was it a hoot! I swear, the swirling mass of metalheads was a site to see indeed. You young'ns with yer karate choppin', believe me, you would get mowed down in the psychosis that is a Chilean pit, no doubt about it.

"There was somewhere around 10-12,000 ragers there [see video below], and at some points there were at least 4,000 lunatics running in that circle, and all innocents would be cut down like weeds in that wall of utter brutality. My hat's off to ya, Chilean Metalhead, you know how to bring it.

"I do have some maddeningly sad news to report, however. Somewhere at the venue, the Movistar Arena, my gear bag was stolen, containing my two Alesis DM5's, my triggers, my stickbag, my in-ears, my leg weights, but most importantly, my BOOTS. The same boots I've played and recorded in for almost the last decade.

"Sentimentality aside, they don't make these boots anymore, as the company who makes them, Boodaz, went out of business around the time I got them. Or else I would just be forced to go out and pick up another pair of size 13 Flameboots. Since I can't do that, I am going to appeal to you directly, my Chilean friends.

"If, for whatever reason, you were to gain knowledge of the whereabouts of my bag (or the bag itself), especially my boots, could I ask you to contact me in care of Rob Shallcross, my manager, at Those boots mean an awful lot to me, and you would have me as friend for life if you would find a way to have them returned to me. Y'see, though the contents of my gear bag can be replaced (at QUITE a cost to me personally), the boots can't.

"So of course, I'd love for the entire gear bag to be returned to me, but I would REALLY appreciate it if at least the boots were. I wouldn't be able to thank you enough, my Chilean friends.

"Thank you so much, Gene.

"P.S.: I had to play in tennis shoes for the first time in 17 years this weekend. They might as well have been ballet slippers. Okay, I'm gonna stop sniveling about it now. Thanks for listening, my friends."

(Metal Detector: Best of luck to you Gene, and to the dumb fuck who stole his equipment and especially the boots, DUDE! THOSE BOOTS WON’T HELP YOU, YOU’RE STILL GOING TO SUCK AT DRUMS PLUS I HOPE YOU GET YOUR ASS KICKED!)

Bruce Dickinson is hiring

Can you fly a plane? How about repair a plane? 
If so, you might be calling Bruce Dickinson not only your fave singer, but also your boss.
Mr Dickinson, who has sold more than 85m records worldwide, is also a commercial airline pilot and aviation entrepreneur. His new company, Cardiff Aviation, will aim to provide specialist aviation support services that include training and aircraft maintenance to clients such as Boeing.
"We'd expect to create up to 1,000 jobs within 18 months, based on the level of interest and commitment from aircraft manufacturers and operators," Mr Dickinson said in a press statement.

May 1, 2012

Guitar World Record beaten

A record of 7,273 guitarists joined together to form the largest EVER tribute by covering the song "Hey Joe" by Jimmy Henrdix. The Guinness Record breaking took place at the town square in Wrocław, Poland today, May 1st, 2012. Previous record also set in Wrocław back in 2009 saw 6,346 guitar player perform the same song.

(see more images here)

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